Recently I was hurt by a situation that I found hard to resolve in my heart. It was not really one incident, but several that all entwined together that slowly broke me from within. I found myself waking up with hot tears rolling down my checks uncontrollably. I have never felt this despair. It was foreign to me. I could not tell anyone about it.
I am normally the one that helps others get to their healing place and yet I could not get there myself. I am the soft healer and support to others and yet I felt alone and weak and defeated. The more defeated I felt, the deeper I felt I was falling. But, I still prayed for God to hold me in His hands until I could gain control of my tears.
I knew the way to heal my heart, but I could not find the way to stop the tears to start the healing process. I knew I had to grieve through my pain as I have told so many other to do. Only God could take my hand to that healing place, I just could not do it alone.
I know that many times God will allow us to cry, deep hot tears but He NEVER lets us go. He is there to hold us up until we stop crying and He will lead us to that place to heal.
Even today, I am healing. But I am stronger because I let myself cry, I let myself greave and I let God heal my heart.
I also know that one small email from someone …. (They will never know how powerful that email was) was enough to help me know God was there…. Still.
As women, we need to support each other, help each other in our weaknesses.
If you paint, paint every time you can. If you dance, dance every moment you have a chance. If you write songs, write on every paper …… don’t let anything stop you. Your art will touch someone around you even if you do not know you are healing someone heart.
I love you all. What could break us, makes us stronger!!